Happy birthday.

Okay I am officially freaking out!! Tomorrow I will have a one year old! I am not old enough! He is not old enough. I want him to stay little for forever! He is becoming so independent! It makes me sad. He doesn't need help getting places or down from the couch. I love him so much though. He is so sweet. He is a handful, but I love to stay busy with him. 

His selfy. Ha 

One year ago I had a baby. 

One year went by way too quick. 

One year of long nights and early mornings.

One year of happy and sad tears.

One year of smiles and laughs. 

One year of pure joy. 

Being a mom is the very best thing I could have ever asked for. It is hard. So so very hard. But man is it worth is. A smile, a kiss, a snuggle. Simple things that can bring a mom to tears. Who knew you could have so much love for anything? Not me. But having Archer has made my love grow. My love for my amazing husband has grown. My love for myself and lack of amazingness has grown. My love for others has grown. Who knew a child could do that? Not me. Who knew that so much can change in one year? Not me. But everything changed. My heart has changed. My outlook has changed. I love being a mother. I am blessed to be able to stay at home with my son and to teach him. I am blessed that I know this is my calling in life. My calling is to be a teacher, nurturer, cook, kisser of boo-boos, doctor, maid, friend. But above all and including everything, it is to be a mom. I am blessed. I am blessed to know this. And I am blessed to have the support system around me that I do have. I love being a mom and can't imagine life any other way. 

 Happy birthday to my sweet one year old ( a day early) 

Just a few cute things

Month ten and eleven

This last couple weeks archer has gotten so very cute with everything he does! Besides the whole angry baby thing.. I haven't caught that one on video yet... But he has started to babble and give kisses, walk and dance!! :) he is getting to be such a big boy! In a little under a month he will be one! What?!? I will have a one year old!! Crazy! Archer loves the pool and he loves shopping.. For now. He is still sleeping in our bed.... And he loves.. I mean he LOVES Mickey Mouse clubhouse. He is starting to climb up stairs and he goes down the slide by himself... On his belly!! Crazy kid!!  He is starting to eat better he eats about four 4 oz. jars of food a day. He is so much fun! Still only five teeth. And is starting to run.. And stick things in sockets... He also understands that he is in trouble when I say no. He also has started to put his hands in the air when I say "where is it? " so cute and fun!

Peekaboo!! :) 

He thinks he is so cool! :) 

Loves the playground! 

Trying to pick up the lawn mower! ⬆ Totally kabes face! 

Look at that hair! Curly??? :) I hope so!! 

Examining the mower wheels! Daddy's little boy! 

So cute. Looks like a little man! Finally getting used to wearing shoes! Size four!!! Crazy big feet! 

Going up the stairs all by himself! Growing too fast! 

Becoming fat..

Archer went to the dr. For his 9 month check up and he weighed 15 lbs 3oz. The dr. Is worried that he isn't eating enough. He still nurses every two hours but he wasn't eating solids all day.. Just sometimes at night. He isn't all that interested in food unless it is water.. But that doesn't help us! So the dr. had us start giving him formula and feeding him solids every three hours... I hate forcing him to eat! It makes me so sad to see him hate food as much as he does! He will just close his mouth up so tight that I can't get any food in it!! The formula thing isn't going so well! If he gets even a drop of that stuff in his mouth he makes a funny face and gags and spits it out right away! Kabe is so much better than I am when it comes to feeding him.. I get too impatient and I don't like making him unhappy so once he starts to turn his head away I kinda give up feeding him (maybe I'm the reason he is so stinking skinny!!) Kabe sticks it out! I'm getting better.. But I hate to sneak food into his mouth when he is screaming.. But I gotta do what I gotta do!! I feel like he is getting better at eating... At times..... But he loves to move and stand and move some more! He hates being put in a chair and forced to eat.. But this is what it has come down to. The dr said she wouldn't be so worried if he was still getting taller but since that has slowed too that we needed to start feeding him MORE! He is so sweet! About two weeks ago he started being cuddly. He will just lay his head down on your shoulder and snuggle with you. I love it!!! He doesn't stay for long but it's just long enough to say "I love you mom!" Then he is wanting down or to rip my hair outta my head.. But it's cute while it lasts!! He also loves to stand. Without needing anything to pull him up! It's nuts!! He loves to be able to pick something up and stand with it! Then be able to keep his balance long enough to stick that something in his mouth! He amazes me every day! He crawls like a spider monkey! And he is super fast! He also has four teeth now and i think he is getting more because he loves to gnaw on his finger! I love him and the joy that he brings to Kabe and I! He is such a sweet little boy! I'm so grateful I get to be his mom!! 

Mother's Day! :)

Wow. What an eventful weekend!! Kabe and I went to our parents houses this weekend. Archer of course is sick... Again.... He was fussy.. But the dr. on Thursday said that he just has a cold. So his boogies started to get more green and he started to feel warm... Friday night I got hardly any sleep... Same with Saturday..... Well I am also sick!! Nasty cough, runny nose, and just feel like poo!!! So I'm coughing all night and archer is crying all night so Kabe also doesn't sleep.... Bad combo!!  So after feeling crappy.. Like REALLY crappy.. After church on Sunday (mothers day) we took archer to wee care... (They should know us by name... We go there almost as much as we go to our own dr!!!) and we waited for an hour.. They got us in and archer has an ear infection... Yay.... But Kabe kept saying sorry to me for a really bad Mother's Day. I told him to not say sorry. It actually wasn't bad at all. I got to see both families. We figured out what's up with archer and I got to spent time with my family. I know it doesn't sound like a good day at all... But it has been a good day. I love every second that I get to spend with my mommy! I love to just sit and chat with her!! She is wise beyond my years!! :) I am so thankful for my mom. For the wonderful example she is to me! For how she raised me. And for everything she has ever done for me. :) I am glad my children get to call her grandma. And I'm grateful for my mother in-law. I'm so thankful that she raised they man she did. For teaching him and blessing my life through him. I am so grateful for all the mothers in my life. I am especially thankful to be a mother to a wonderful little boy. Times are hard right now with him. But they are worth it. Only sleeping three hours a night is worth it to get those sweet smiles, or snuggles. Changing dirty diapers or constantly chasing him around telling him "no" and redirecting attention all day is worth it. It was all worth it. The 8 months of being pregnant, having to pee all the time, being sick sick sick, uncomfortable, hot( not sexy hot. Like warm temperature hot), having throw up all over, being a human tissue, or feeling like a freaking cow (in all ways) it's worth it. The long nights, the tears. They are ALL worth it. Because one day my little baby will grow into a man. And I will get to say that I love that man. I cared for that man. I thought that wonderful man how to do most of the things he does. I get to one day hold his babies. And they will be worth it. Smiles, laughs, giggles, cuddles, sounds, names, smarts. They are worth it. I am so thankful that I am a mother. There is no greater calling in this world. I'm thankful for my mom who had thought me how to be a mom. Thank you mom. And to all the moms out there. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!! :) 

Tooth #2

Archer has been a little grumpy pants.. And one day while he was crying I saw another little white bump in his mouth!!! Another tooth?? What?!? He seems to forget it is there in the day but at night he is super grumpy!! He is growing up way too fast!! On Sunday archer and I were in the foyer and I had let him crawl around in the lower part of it and next thing I know he climbed up three stairs to go see the other babies!! All by himself! I didn't show him that he needed to put both legs on one step to reach up to the next one or anything. He just did it! Like eh no big deal! I was amazed!! My little baby is growing up so much!! I love to watch him figure stuff out. The other day I had put a laundry basket on top of him (like a turtle shell) and he figured out how to take it off.
Yesterday I put him in a patterned onsie and he just looked at it for like three minutes. He was so interested in it. He loves to take books off the shelves and to stand up by himself. He loves to lick everything.. And I mean everything!! With his teeth he can bite through a cutie orange.. (Verrrrry messy!!!) and he is a pro at sitting up. It is so crazy how much bigger he has gotten in just the last month!! My little baby isn't so little anymore!! But it's exciting to watch him grow and learn. I love archer. I know Kabe does too. It's such a blessing to be is mom. I'm also blessed to have Kabe as my husband and partner. A father to archer and I'm so glad to be sealed to both of them!!

Tooth, standing up, steps!!!! What's next??

On Sunday Archers first tooth came through!!!! He has been pulling himself up on things and pushing them away so he can stand... He has gotten a couple of really good bumps on his face from falling into things... He has taken a couple of steps.. But he is taking them while falling... He is getting too big!! His favorite thing right now is to pull all of his books off the bottom shelf of the bookcase and crawl into it. He thinks it is a game or something. He is so adventurous and he is a champ at crawling now. So we keep all of the doors closed and anything breakable up high.. Because he pulls himself up on everything. And I mean EVERYTHING! He is a handful but he is so fun!! I love every second with him!! He has learned how to shriek now... He is a little pro at that.. Even though mommy and daddy hate hate hate it!! Also he has gotten a lot more vocal. He is starting to babble. Baba bada daba kinda like that.. No dada or mama yet.... :( I love him! It's so cute to actually see him smile his real smiles!! I'm so glad the medicine is working!! I'm glad to have my baby archer back!!

The problem.

The problem.

Finally! Finally!!! After three and a half MISERABLE months we figured out what was wrong.
We had the HAPPIEST, most smiley baby in the world about four months ago. But it all of the sudden changed.. I don't know if it was his ear infection that changed it, or throwing up all of his medicine, but archer was a totally different child. Not as happy, Always uncomfortable, fussy, and he HATED to eat. When I say hated he would seriously cry himself to sleep before he ate. I felt like the worst mom.. But he needed to eat!! He wasn't chunking up like all the other little babies around. We took him in three or four different times because we didn't know what was going on.. And every time our dr. Just said it was teething.. But there were no teeth at four months... There still are no teeth at 7 1/2 months. Kabe and I were going insane our baby was breaking us!! Something needed to happen! We took him in for a sick appointment and we didn't get our usual dr. So we told the dr what was going on with him and how he didn't want to eat he was also losing weight. this really awesome lady dr. said well, it sounds like acid reflux. Lets put him on a trial dosage if it doesn't seem to help, bring him back and we will do more extensive tests. Well, lo and behold it seems like its working.. I haven't seen archer smile this much in a long long long time. It's awesome to actually have him want to eat more than just a spoonful or two of baby food!! It's nice to actually not fight him to get him to nurse! It's nice to see him happy.
Ps I'm going to go all churchy with this next part.
I can't even imagine what it would be like to watch your son suffer, like Christ did in gethsemane. It was hard not knowing what was wrong. But I think it would be even harder to know what was making your child hurt, what was making them suffer so much that they wanted to die... I feel so blessed to be able to go see doctors. To have modern medicine. To be able to know that Kabe and I weren't alone in the long nights, the endless crying, the feelings of being broken. It is nice to know that someone else has gone through it all, and even worse. I am so thankful for my Heavenly Father. I am also thankful for my savior Jesus Christ. I know that they love me. That they love my son. And they love my husband. I am so thankful for Kabe. He is my rock. He keeps me sane when I feel like there is no hope. I'm especially thankful for Archer. For the amazing little boy he is. For the things he teaches me daily. ( mostly over and over again on how to be patient) for the little tiny bit of insight he has given me to know what our Father in Heaven feels like about his children. I am so thankful that I know I can be with my family forever. I know that if I try my best each day and work harder each day (no I'm not perfect , I will never be in this life) I will be able to return to my Heavenly Father. I also am so grateful for my mom and dad. They made me who I am today. I am so very thankful that they get to be the grandparents of my children. I am so thankful for the opportunity it ha been to be a mom. To be able to learn an grow each day.
This church is true! (The church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day saints) I know it. I live it. I LOVE it.

Life

Life... It comes at you fast!!

Ahh so sorry I haven't posted in what feels like forever.. Well it has been forever! Last week we had a wonderful opportunity to go to disneyland and to hang out there for four days. BEST FOUR DAYS EVER!! I love Disneyland. I seriously could live there. Archer was so good the whole time!! Even in the car!! :) we got him a buzz hoodie!! It's so stinking cute!!! He loved riding all the rides!! And he loved hanging out with grandma miller while mom and dad rode rides together. We went to a couple of shows and saw kabes little sister perform! They did amazing. While we (all of the millers and the coxs) were watching billy hill and the hillbillys, billy stopped the show and looked over at archer and said in a very hick voice "is that a real baby??" And of course archer is just staring at him, not blinking or anything... Everyone laughed and he said archer was cute. Later on in the show kabes mom was taking pictures of archer and billy stopped again and said "look they are even taking pictures of your baby!! " he had no idea that we knew each other! It was so fun! I got to see fantasmic, world of color, a bugs life, and billy hill. We went on almost every ride in both parks and we got to go on the new cars land ride. AMAZING!! :) I loved it!! I couldn't have even imagined it looking like it did!! It seriously looked like I just stepped into the movie! I loved it! I got to see mater! :) made my whole day! It's so crazy what they can do with animatronics now!! All of the cars looked real. Like full sized cars, taken right from the movie!! So cool!! They even have the cozy cone motel!! It's awesome!!! I could live in that place! The lines were crazy long!! Thank goodness for Braydon and the baby pass!! It was so fun to see Braydon care about everyone so much! (And show it.. Cause he has a hard time showing it most if the time) I love him. I'm so glad I get to tease him and call him my little brother. ( even though he is almost 6 inches taller than me!!! ) he is so sweet. Probably one of the sweetest 14 almost 15 year olds I know. Ps. Happy autism awareness month! Anyway... Disneyland was great!! So many memories were made!! :) I will always and forever be a Disney girl!! Ps. Do not ever rent a hotel for 50 buck.. You get what you pay for and nothing more.... Maybe even less... Worst overnight stay.. Never again... Okay. Rant finished! Man is it nice to be back in my own bed.. But the nice Cali weather did NOT follow us home!! :( boo!!! It needs to be spring. No more snow. Just a little rain here and there and then lots of sun!!! Oh by the way I was so good about putting sunscreen on I didn't even get burnt when we were in Disneyland... But... I didn't even think about the car ride home... Yeah... My face got sunburnt... :( boo!!! Anyway... If you ever get the chance to go to Disneyland... DO IT!!! So worth it!! Cars is my favorite ride.. And himelicks chew chew train!! :)

First date. Best date.

First date.

12/18/10 first date. I remember getting into your car(you opened the door for me) and loving the way it felt sitting next to you, listening to you sing. Going out to eat, then you handing me the GPS and saying "okay. You're in charge. Lead us to the concert" little did I know I was holding the stupid thing UPSIDE DOWN!!! We laughed and you made fun of me for the rest of the night, I led you down the wrong road and we were stuck in traffic for ten minutes.. Oops... We FINALLY got to the concert and you were deciding on if you wanted to pay for parking or just park in a gas station parking lot.. You made up your mind after I told you I wouldn't ever let you live it down if your car got towed.. :) we parked in the pay for parking. I couldn't believe how thoughtful you were when you came back in after the intermission with a water bottle for me.. (My heart was melting!!) after the concert we didn't want to sit in the car and wait for the traffic to clear so we walked around... It was one of those super awkward moments when you can tell you both wanna hold hands cause they keep hitting each other.. FINALLY after what felt like ages you grabbed my hand and we walked and talked for a few minutes. We got into the car (opened my door again!!!!) and we were on our way home. On the way home you made fun of me some more and we flirted like no ones business!!! You took me too my doorstep and you hugged me. I opened the door and went inside. As soon as the door closed I slid down the door (seriously like in the movies) and stated "Mom, I'm in love!!!" She rolled her eyes at me but I seriously had a feeling that this could go somewhere... I absolutely loved the fact that you opened every door for me. I was so impressed. And you know what... I still love how you open my door for me. :) I love how when a good song comes on in the car you start to sing it! And I love that we can still tease each other and flirt like there is no tomorrow. Every day I thank my father in heaven because he sent me you. A worthy priesthood holder, the cutest daddy ever, a wonderful provider, a very caring companion. I am so thankful for you. I love you.

Archer Ray Miller

Archer is now 6 months old!! Ahhh!!! I'm FREAKING out!!  Where did time go?? Why did my little baby have to get so big so quick?? What was it like when you weren't mobile?? I ask myself these questions almost every day! Archer is pretty much crawling. No 6 month old is supposed to crawl!!!! The other day I was doing dishes and I heard something fall and I go into the living room (like three steps away) and he had pulled a mirror onto his head, and got a little bruise from it... now the bumps and bruises begin. He also doesn't just crawl to things. He has now figured out how to roll from his tummy to his back. He can almost sit up... but he falls after like five seconds.   He LOVES big people food. Not the big people food pureed and fed to him with a little person spoon. No. The big people food mom and dad eat. If he could he would eat the same meals mom and dad do. But we don't let him.. I will every once in a while let him gnaw on my apple core or something like that. But he has totally refused little people food for now...  Last week we thought he was sick so we took him in.. they said that he was just teething and that the bottom left front tooth was coming in. (I know there has to be a smarter name for that tooth.. I just don't know it.) So needless to say I haven't been getting very much sleep, or anything done around the house...

6 months ago on this day at 7:53am Archer Ray Miller was born. One of the greatest days of my life. :] He has blessed my life more than anyone could ever know and more than I ever could have thought.

Archer Ray 

6 months 

14.3 lbs 

25 3/8 inches

Mission #5 New Things

Mission #5 New things.

1. Archer is a little rolling machine!
2. Archer is a copy cat.
3. Archer is starting to scoot.
4. We think (notice how I said "we think") Archer is getting a tooth! (I don't really know if he is... its my first baby! I just know he is very very very fussy!! And not sick.)
5. Archer has started solid (well not really solid, more like pureed solids) food.

1. Archer first decided to roll over when we were in Vegas. He can roll from his back to his tummy really really well. He loves to be on his tummy cause he can see so much more. He loves to be on the ground for about five minutes.. any longer than that and he will start to cry.

2. Archer has been a little thinking. He will watch you do something and he will mimic it. He will move his hand when you wave at him. He will TRY and make the same sounds as you when you make sounds at him. He will pull faces that I guess I make to him all the time (Kabe told me so.) Archer is too smart for his (and our) own good. He can watch and mimic very very well. I'm in a lot of trouble with this one....

3. Archer is starting to get up on all fours. Sometimes he will only push with his legs and his little booty will go so high in the air that I'm afraid he is going to do a front flip!! He doesn't have the whole leg arm leg arm movement down yet. He will get up on all fours and just dive forward and sprawl his arms and legs out. :] He is so much fun to have in our home.

4. We THINK Archer is getting a tooth.. We have no idea what is wrong with him. All we know is that we don't get enough sleep, or time where he is not screaming... I just hope it is a tooth and it will show itself here soon.. and then he can go back to being the really happy loving baby that he was. :]

5. Archer loves carrots.. Well not like real carrots that are sticks of orange goodness. But of the mashed orange stuff that looks the same going in as it does coming out! (Ewww... sorry!) But he loves carrots. He HATES and refuses to eat the rice cereal. He is a little messy though when he eats... he is still learning how to get the food to stay in his mouth. He doesn't do a good job at closing his mouth all the way when he is eating. I'm sure he will get better, but for now he is just a messy little boy. :]

Archer is getting so so big! I love him, but I also miss the little tiny baby that he once was. I know everyone told me to enjoy them while they are young, and I did, but I didn't know that they would grow so fast!!! :[ boo.

Valentines day was amazing! :]

Archer and I matched. Red pants and a white shirt. :] Kabe got me some Chocolate covered Strawberries. :] Some manicure things and a red rose. :] <3 I don't know if I could be more spoiled.  I'm glad Kabe had the whole day off so we could spend time together as a family!! :] I really couldn't have asked for a better day. I'm so glad that I have these two men in my life. :] They bless me every day more than they even know. 

dinner was amazing too!!!! :] homemade!! booya!!